WARM- UP Before I start writing Ad Copies for our promotional materials, it has been my tradition to write something (a poem, a blog, a song, sensible or not), so that I could proceed with my work w/o any sh*tty things on my mind. haha. :) I don’t know how I’d label this one. Just keep reading. For any violent reactions, go ahead and write your own note.lol.. ***

BORROWED Do you know how hard it is, to only HAVE someone and not OWN him? It’s like borrowing a really fancy dress from someone, and wearing it for a very limited time. You’ll feel good and act like it’s really yours, but eventually, you know that you’ll have to take it off and return it to its real owner.. It’s like having your neighbor ask you to baby sit her kid. You’ll feel like he’s really yours as you hold him into your arms..but at the end of the day, you’re well aware that you would have to bring that kid back to his real home. Being in a no-strings-attached relationship is just the same. You know you can hug, hold or even kiss that person, but you can never expect him to respond everytime you say “I LOVE YOU” You can have him by your side but you can’t expect him to still be there for you especially when you’re in deep sh*t, coz the truth is, he doesn’t really care enough to dwell in your life’s drama. you have to make the first move when it comes to dates, sweet nothings, physical interactions and the like..,coz it’s you who wants him more. the only thing he could always make a first move on is telling you that it’s time to stop everything, for it’s him who wants you less. you try hard not to keep contact with other guys, even with your girl friends, so as not to disappoint him. But you can never say you’re jealous when he spends more time with his guy friends, nor can you be angry when you see how his head turns when a chick passes by. You can’t be angry seeing him with other girls..all you can do is cry silently at the thought that he can be the sweetest, kindest and most thoughtful person with THEM and not with YOU. You ask yourself everyday of the reasons why he won’t commit, and in the long run, you’ll think, maybe there’s no real answer to your questions, just reasons, nothing but REASONS. You start thinking, am I not good enough? am I not the girl he would want to have as his own?..and you’ll just end up with more questions, more insecurities, more pain. people ask you “who’s that guy?” and you say ” he’s the one I love, we’re just not ready yet.”..you keep ignoring their sympathetic reactions thoughgt at the back of your mind you know that when others ask him, his only response is “we’re just friends” Tiring, isn’t it? the cycle will keep going on until you decide to STOP everything. The only way to finally put an end to it is in your hands, because once you say it’s over, there’s no turning back, coz you know he won’t even care to run after you. BUT still, you choose to stay. You’ve probably received all the sermons imaginable..from your friends, from your family and from everyone around you, yet you choose to remain deaf. As the cycle goes on, you can’t even tell why you’re still staying..is it still because of love? or is it because you got so used to all the pain that you can’t even imagine living without it.. or is it because,you feel that if you let go and you find another, you’ll be neglected of commitment once again… or… is it simply because.. you’re willing to hold him for now and finally let go once his real owner, the girl of her dreams, the one he would commit to, would take him away from you…